Warning: heavy stuff. :)
I've mentioned that there have been a lot of changes happening around this place, and I've tried to be honest about the hard decisions and tough stuff that goes along with that. At the same time, I know that every one has their own story, their own hard times, and their own "tough stuff". I don't want this to sound like a big post of whining and complaining, but I do want to remember what I was feeling and what I've learned going through this. I'm trying to believe that things happen for a reason, and I know that you have to stay positive no matter what life throws your way.
This summer, doctors found a mass in my mom's colon. They were "very confident" that the mass was cancer, stage 3 cancer at that. My life, and everyone in my family's life, was turned upside down. The first day, I was in shock. We all were. I didn't know what to say, what to feel, what to think. I was numb. The next two days were the worst, as I started to realize what the future could look like in the next few months. I tried to stay strong, but really, it was the most scary news I had heard, ever. Long story short, she had doctor appointments for 7 weeks before a final diagnosis was given. The initial mass had shrunk; she was cancer-free. Again, I was shocked. Prayers answers, a miracle, really.
Looking back, I am confident that this experience happened for a reason. I can't speak for my mom, or anyone else in my family, but I know that I have grown up more than ever this summer. In my list-loving fashion, here are a few things I now know for sure:
1. My mom is one tough lady. I was in awe with her strength in hearing this news. She was the most positive, enlightened person of all of us. I learned so much from watching her go through what was the most scary diagnosis. I'll never forget that.
2. Family IS the most important. I will do anything for any of them, and I know the same is true from them.
3. Be generous with your love. Life really does throw you curve balls when you least expect them. Be there when it matters, and be there when it doesn't matter. Just be there.
4. No regrets. Say what you mean, mean what you say. Don't wait for the perfect moment.
5. Be grateful for what you have. Always.
6. Life is precious.
7. Don't be afraid to talk to people who are hurting-- it's better to say something than nothing. I found that it's awkward and hard to tell people when you are going through a tough time. But it's so nice to talk about it, and not have the dark cloud looming over you. I'll hope I can remember this when I know someone is hurting.
8. On that note, you never really know what someone is going through.
9. Call, text, write, email, whatever it takes. Say something so that people know you care.
10. Have faith. Be positive.
I feel so blessed to have a happy ending to my family's story. And I know that it's not always the case, and I am beyond thankful for everyone who has supported me through those 7 weeks.
2 weeks after finding out my mom was healthy, her dad, my grandpa, was diagnosed with lung cancer. Life is full of twists and turns, but in my opinion, it's all about perspective.
-m
